Talk Thursday Topic

Talk Thursday is an informal group that communicate off line with a topic each week. The topic chooser rotates, and there’s an informal schedule of whose turn it is. Each person posts whatever comes to mind on their blog. Those interested in participating may do so – feel free to link back in the comments section. If you want to be in on the topic announcement, which is typically done offline, feel free to email me and I’ll add you to the informal list.  The informal group consists of these bloggers:

Cele
Lynn
Eddie
Angie
Jennifer

This week, I’m the topic chooser.  I have been less than active, nay, I’ve been AWOL on writing Talk Thursday topics for months now.  I’m posting this topic so that I have a reminder to get off my ass and write something that is due by next Thursday (04/30).

The topic for this week is:  “found what I never lost.”

That is all, carry on.

Pussy Caps

TLC (aka Tom), the wonderful host of Beanie Cap Guy, is having a faboo sale on his Pussy Caps.  His models are gorgeous, by the way.

Run.  Do not walk.  To your nearest credit card.

Imagine.  Hand-dyed yarn.  Hand spun by artist Lisa Souza.  Yarn so soft that you’ll want to rub the cab over every inch of your body.  If you’re single, you won’t need a date for the weekend, and if you go out in your Pussy Cap, you’ll be screamin’ ‘hawt hawt hawt’ with attitude and style.

A year or so ago I purchased one of his creations – I LOVE it.  I would include a picture, but I would then be tempted to take someone up on a dare and be inappropriate and risque, and these days I’m the model of decorum.  Besides, I don’t want to make anyone’s eyes bleed.  No.  Don’t tempt me.

Go see Tom’s stuff and get thee a Pussy Cap!  You know you want one.  If us gay guys can have a Pussy Cap, then you straight folks need to step it up and get one.  Now.  Sale ends on February 15th.

The Masked Blade

When in doubt, make yourself a super hero.  A big gay shout out to Sammy and Aaron for prompting the spontaneous fun.  (Eddie saw the pic and thought it said “the Naked Blade.”)

The Masked Blade

For those who still frequent my infrequent and sporadic postings…  here’s your reader assignment:  do you have a favorite comic book character/superhero, and if so, please share in the comments. I’m curious how many times Wonder Woman comes up (because she was one of my faves).

***

Pardon the really rough subject change but it was a rough day.  A rough couple of days.  Like riding a cactus banister, bare assed.

I’m out of my comfort zone and don’t feel like I’m at my best.  One year as a manager and I’m struggling with the hyper-awareness of being referee for groups or employees that don’t share toys or play nicely in their sandbox together.  I struggle with fairness and objectivity, because I don’t want to treat team-mates like I’ve been treated in the past.  I do my best to speak positively as related to projects and accomplishments and deadlines and I bend over backwards to listen for more of their life story than the day to day grind – work is important, but people are more important than their work.  I’ve given criticisms and negative feedback when it’s warranted.  I struggle with the feeling that I could be doing more.  I feel like I need to channel more of my inner gay superhero:  magic personality, cutting wit, dynamic awareness, matching belt and shoes, and a mask that hides my alter-ego and delicate nature.

**sigh**

Delicate.

Right.  Delicate as a douche commercial.  Or pulling out those splinters from the cactus banister using a pair of pliers, as mentioned above.

This is the part where I’m doing a self-evaluation and wondering how I stack up in the “excels at” column.  Or not.

***

Last but not least, I have not heard back from the writing conference about my submission.  Meanwhile, tic toc, tic toc, tic toc.

Le sigh.

Stupidity is a dominant gene

Darwin was wrong.  It’s survival of the most incredibly stupid, negligent, or attention-sucking.

Nadia Suleman:  single, unemployed mother of six (through a sperm-donor friend), has octoplets because she’s “lonely.”  Her fucktard of a physician deserves to have their medical license revoked.  Nadia, I hate to break it to ya, but giving birth doesn’t grant you the priveledge of motherhood.  You turned yourself into a self-centered baby-machine and your children need a guardian.

John McCain:  bitter little troll who favors a stimulus plan that’s less than half of what the Democrats favor.  Bailouts are for elitists and not us “regular” people?  Bush and his crew blew the federal budget’s wad over the past eight years and it will take generations to clean up their international spooge.

Catholic Bishop Williamson and the Vatican:  Reinstate an excommunicated fringe dude who denies the Holocaust and underestimate the world’s reaction.  Class act, Pope Benedict.  Class act.

California State Legislature:  With a budget crisis at $40 Billion and growing (because we’re borrowing and incurring high interest debt), you’d think it would be criminal for the legislature to be doing anything but balance a budget.  There will be no solution without raising taxes and cutting services.  If I was a god of this universe, I’d make it law that legislatures responsible for late or overspent budgets would be removed from office immediately, without pay or benefits, and assigned to the department of landfills, sorting through trash to recycle.

Other nominees are Rush Limbaugh, Bill O’Reilly, Ann Coulter, Senator Orrin Hatch, Dick Cheney, and Sarah Palin.  I’d give specific examples but I’m tired and I’m satisfied with collectively despising their existence.

The Interview, redux

The instructions…You have to link back to the original post and also to your interviewer’s post and include the following:

Want to be part of it? Follow these instructions:
1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.” Be sure your comment has your email addy.
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions. (If you don’t have a blog – respond on the comment thread.)
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Gallus asked me these questions:

1. If you could have lunch with any three people, who would you like to dine with most? I’d love to dine with my Scott, Julz, and her Bill at a sushi restaurant because we haven’t done that for a while and they are lovely and dear friends.
2. As a writer, if the pen is mightier than the sword, what is the most cutting thing you’ve ever written? Other than hating Mormonism and Rush Limbaugh and Ann Coulter, I’m more bark than bite to the outer world. In my inner world? Call me He Who Inflicts a Thousand Cuts to Himself with the Stupidity Knife. Here’s a sample of cutting self-love and one of my favorite mistakes. Other wounds were less obvious, like the story of Leo in part I and part II.
3. What is your best naked story? since we know you like blogging naked. Not sure how to define “best” naked story, nor which context, nor setting. We could be talking bad nights, early boyfriend experiences, making up stories, attempting poetry, or maintaining eye contact at the gym.
4. There are foods and here are comfort foods, What is something you love, but would never tell anyone (except us)? I have no shame nor qualms about my love of food. By all rights, I should be 400 pounds, but I can thank the gods for my smaller frame and higher metabolism (but those gods need to crank it up a notch – this aging thing really sucks). Specific food? I love potatoes and could eat them at every meal. If you taunted me with McDonald’s fries, I would leap across the table and tackle you.
5. What is one trait that instantly endears a person to you? Out of my personal favorites of being contrary, moody, snarky, and adorkable… then I’ll go with adorkable. I could market the essence and call it “Eu de Don.” Move over, Beckham.

Blog Viagra, anyone?

Quick, someone send me some blog viagra.  I’ve gone flaccid.  I was chatting with Cele and I admitted that I hadn’t had a blog boner in quite a while.  I’m afraid I haven’t been up (ahem) to the task.

What have I been doing?  I’m glad I asked, so in no particular order:

• So scattered I didn’t even do my own post for Talk Thursday.  Oops.  Don’t bother with the guilt routine, I’m immune unless it’s self-administered, and I’m fine with my decision.
• Second Life.  Virtual crack.  When there’s so much going on in your own life (and when you need a little distraction from blogging), you too can create whoever you want to be today.
• Work projects are progressing nicely.  I’m in project management mode, which means “Morale cheerleader.”  Stern but supportive taskmaster.  I’ve gone from data whore to data pimp.
• B-day party for one of Scott’s co-workers who lives in an amazing house in Alamo.  Million dollar views, movie-star driveway, circular stairs, wine-cellar, suit-of-armor, built in keginator off the kitchen, wrap-around decks, master bathroom with glass ceilings and walls.  Materialism envy rears its head.
• Spore.  More virtual crack, but on the cute side.  No animated penii or breasticles or simulated strippers like in Second Life.
• Working out.  I’m at the “is this worth it?” stage, but get re-motivated when I see myself naked.
• Airport run with Scott to pickup a friend.
• Naps.  Twenty minutes and I’m good.  Refreshed.  Almost pleasant even.
• Brunch at Katy’s Creek (California Benedicts are to die for!) with Mark and Rommel.
• Domestic disaster.  We’re getting new carpet in the master bedroom (long overdue) on Friday.  Being the prepared people that we are, we started moving furniture over the weekend.  Sunday, while Scott was in the shower, I tried to move the bed by myself – you know – just scooch it one side at a time.  I scooched it, all right…. and broke the leg of the headboard.  Scott heard my f-bomb while he was showering.
• Bed-frame and mattress shopping.  When you’re a domestic disaster and you break something, go shopping.  Word.
• Tonight I painted one wall and ran. out. of. paint. (Is it only men who think that paint and inches go farther than they think they do?)  Yes, yes, I’ll post pictures, once we’re done, but our deadline is by Thursday night because the carpet guys come and do a remove and replace on Friday.

Not Sharing

Besides the fact I haven’t been online because I was behind the Zion Curtain, and despite how I recovered from excessive vodka and vino (not at the same time, dearies, I’m occassionally not-smart but I’m not stupid)…  I haven’t felt like saying a whole lot.  Thoughts rumble around my mostly-empty head and I’m aware that I’m focusing on not focusing.  If this is serenity, I have to say I rather like chaos.  And sex and erotica and alcohol and dancing.  But I digress.

Here’s what I’ve not been sharing:

• New fave drink is carbonated water with ice.
• Working out, stretching and meditating… and slowly making progress.
• I’m likin’ the new template here.  The days of my black blog are over.
• Thank you to Christopher for the new headers (top of page).
• Scott and I are talking marriage before November.
  • No ceremony, no announcements, no presents, no photographers.
  • We already have rings.
  • We loved our 2005 commitment ceremony.
  • Neither of us want the other’s last name, but we may merge both and make one.
  • I would be completely fine with another honeymoon.
• I’m on book three of a young adult series, and book one of a new vampire series which I liked even though I thought the main character (who unfortunately survived) had as much empathy and compassion as Vlad the Impaler.
• Tarot and archetypes.  Its’ been ages since I did a reading, even though I took my stash with me (runes and two decks) to Utahrd.  Tarot of the Spirit, also affectionately known as the “Armageddon” deck.  Not for the faint of heart or heartless.  Helpful if one is familiar with Joseph Campbell and world mythologies.
• We hauled out the pool cover, which means summer is over.  If we’re lucky, we can use the cover and still be swimming through October, global warming permitting.
• With the turning of summer into fall, I have ample reason to pull out TLC’s Pussy Cap for our walks with Midas.  More on TLC when I can wrap some words around the wonder that he is.
• It’s a fellow blogger’s birthday tomorrow and I am completely unprepared.  I’d like to dedicate either a poem or a gorgeous hunk of a man to him.  Or offer to write him a short story.  Or send a care package of music, apricot butter, vodka, wine, or a big fuckin’ basket of all the above.  His choice.

That is all.

What’s on YOUR mind?

Now What

Angie brought up a great topic for last week’s Talk Thursday, which was “I got my wish! Now what?” Below are some of my thoughts on the topic, which I’m posting belatedly, but ya know… I’m posting. Deal.

What happens after the prince slays the dragon(s) and wins the kingdom? What happens when you get your wish, when you get the things or circumstances or person that you wanted, needed, craved or desired? What happens when you were willing to make a deal with god or God or the universe… and it came to be? I’ll leave the issue of manifestion (point A of wishing to point B of realization) for another day – but I will say that in that crystal moment of knowing what you want and speaking it clearly, the universe listens…

I believe that we as humans need conflict and disappointment. Struggles are essential. Friction serves as a motivator. Dissent is an opportunity to experience another view. Dissonance demonstrates the methods that are not harmonious. In the great words of the Eurythmics, peace is just a word. Happily ever after only happens in movies, and the moment the credits start rolling change has already happened, for better or for worse. Heroes grow old(er). Crowns become heavy. Hearts feel complacent. Self-actualization is like an orgasm – you know it when you’re experiencing it, and when it’s fading you wonder when you’ll experience it again.

Change is imminent, even within contentment.

I’m clapping if you’ve made it this far and are asking “what the HELL are you talking about?” Here: I’m confessing that I’m lazy, that I want an outer motivator to do my work for me so I don’t have to look inside and start prioritizing and recognizing the things that are important to me. I got MOST of my wishes in life (love, career, home, friends, family) and it’s time I took stock – check off the things I’ve done/received and keep adding new stuff, which of course is the biggest challenge: I don’t know what I want. What’s next? I want the answers without doing the work.

Agree? Disagree? Want to slap me yet?

This is the part when I want to delete everything, but I’ll post. I have no qualms sharing. I’m shameless that way.

News Du Jour

It’s a good thing I’m not President of any country, because I would promote various policies that taxed or outright banned organized religions.  Some days I’m in the same boat as Jesse Ventura, who said that “…organized religion is a sham and a crutch for weak-minded people who need strength in numbers. It tells people to go out and stick their noses in other people’s business.”  Some days I’d like to see members of the American Taliban on a reality-tv show:  Christian Survivor.  Some days.  Some days I get annoyed when those same American Taliban somehow think non-Republicans don’t have values or spirituality in their lives.  I get REALLY annoyed and so-not-like Ghandi (or Buddha) when the American Taliban assume that gay men and women don’t have values or standards or ethics.  I’ll go one further:  I believe and don’t believe many things, and I don’t begrudge you one bit if you think/believe differently than I do.  The only distinction… don’t tell me what to believe.

Most days I find it amusing that Republicans assumed the mantle of piety and reverence for faith-based initiatives.  Today’s article that focused on Barrack Obama made me rethink and wonder.  No matter what happens this election year, the Republican’s glass house is shattering.

***

I’ve worked in the higher education arena for over sixteen years.  Back when I lived in Utah, I remember the feeling of smugness and “how is this news?” moment when I heard that Brigham Young University received the top ranking for schools that are “Stone Cold Sober.”  The Mormon bastion of useful knowledge (I say it like that because one of their higher mucky-mucks thinks that only SOME knowledge is useful – the rest is not “faith promoting”) received their eleventh consecutive honor and distinction this year.  I’d love to see the report for which campus has the highest incidences of anxiety medicine (Xanax, Valium, etc) prescription abuse.  Any guesses how B.Y.U. would do?

***

Change is coming.  Energy policy is not being created by villains such as Cheney and his Haliburton posse.  The oil industry’s star has risen, but they may be on the decline.  I hadn’t thought about agriculture and farmers affecting energy policies, but this article makes sense about their huge network and social support.  Sucks to be an oil exec that doesn’t know how much money they make, doesn’t it?

***

What’s new with YOU?

Water Water Everywhere

(I will apologize in advance – no – I did not think to take pictures.)

Friday morning I ran errands for a few hours.  My 4-10 schedule ends in a few more weeks and it’s back to the M-F gig, but now that the three day weekends are close to ending I was finally feeling the need to be productive.  Hence the errands.

As I parked in front of the house I noticed water running over the sidewalk on our neighbor’s side.  A lot of water, all the way down the street.  Their cars weren’t home and I wondered if a sprinkler head was broken.  I stood on the edge of our yard and followed the trail of water:  street, sidewalk, front yard, to mid-yard.  The flow of water was way too much for a broken sprinkler, and at this point I started worrying more than I already was.

I stepped onto the grass in our yard and I noticed it was soggy.  In the middle of the edge of our yard, closest to the neighbors, we have a French drain that exits in one of our flowerbeds.  The entire bed was saturated and water was coming out of the drain, emptying into the beds and the overflow was running into our neighbor’s yard. The worry turned into dread.  The two things could make that amount of water:  a leak in the solar heating system on the side of the house, or the pool equipment (filter, pumps, pipes).  I ran to the front door and through the house to the back door, then onto the patio.

I may have said something profane:  the pool was almost half empty.

I ran past across the patio and backyard to the pool equipment.  I opened the control panel and turned off the pump.  The ground all around the pool equipment was soaked.  I stood inside the wheelbarrow next to the fence and looked over into the neighbor’s yard.  The lower third of their yard down to their fence and up against their covered patio was soaked.  Water marks showed almost six inches above the ground.  I worried about their dogs, but then I saw Wilson and Horton rounding the corner where it was dry and they barked at me.  I jumped down and ran inside to call Scott.

A little later, Scott came home and checked the solar panels, the pipes and the filters.  The best we can figure is that the air relief valve on the diatomaceous filters had stuck open because of a clog.  The spray from top of the filter went everywhere in a twenty foot radius.  Unfortunately, Scott’s tomato plants survived (for those who don’t know me well – I despise uncooked tomatos).  Hours later when the neighbors were home, they reported no damage and no water in their house or garage – only the dog beds got wet.  It took only a few hours to drain, but it took over eight hours to fill the pool again.

We figure we lost roughly 10,000 gallons.  Ten.  Thousand.  Gallons.  The water bill is going to be lovely.  I’m thinking we may buddy up for our morning showers for the next several… years.  I’m up to that kind of water conservation.

Unless you’re Noah, don’t bother answering.  Have you ever been in any kind of flood?  How do you feel about water conservation?  Do you practice water conservation?  Do you xeriscape?  Leave the water running while you brush your teeth?