My mom left messages at work, home and on my cell on Tuesday. I knew it was serious, because she usually calls and doesn’t leave a message. After the PSA test and biopsy, the docs told my folks that dad has prostate cancer, she said, sotto voce. He will be 72 in December, and the doctors advise radiation treatments instead of surgery.
My first partner and one of my best friends (Douglas) called on Wednesday. He’s going through relationship challenges that mirror what he and I went through oh-so-many years ago and he wanted my perspective… of “Why?” “How?” It was an hour of dual conversations of his present now and our collective past. I own and worked through all the issues of the past, but repeating them today is still exhausting.
Work tried calling Wednesday evening when I was at the gym. (Did I mention that I started going to the gym again and that I feel deliciously sore, but totally frustrated at my loss of endurance? No, I’m sure I’ve not shared that tidbit.) This manager was running reports several days after I’d given him the files, but the way he was running them was causing errors. To my boss’ credit, she told him that “no, Don’s not available to help you at 9:00pm because normal people run their reports during the day when the support and resources are available if needed.” My consolation is knowing that this asshat gets to pay my overtime from this week.
Thursday, my friend Eddie and I exchanged text messages. I talked to him this morning on the way to work. He was home, because he lost his job on Friday. The positive is that it’s not a crisis, because his wife works and makes very good money. The negative is the stress and hassle of finding a new job.
I don’t like telephones. There are times when I can’t get off the phone fast enough. Call it what you will (assholishness, indifference, being uncaring, feeling overwhelmed, being apathetic, being moody, etc), but I can easily ignore the phone and not pick up, even at work. Voicemail is a lovely thing for when you DO have the stamina to listen and respond.
September 21, 2007 at 5:59 pm
We are As One once again. I hate the phone, I almost always go for the voice mail option.
And I’m sorry your phone brought the news that your dad has cancer. I hope he will be okay.
Hug again. Hey, I need ‘em too – sue me.
September 21, 2007 at 8:35 pm
My dad got cancer of the liver when he was 82 years old. He was one of the healthiest men…
He had jet black hair. It turned gray overnight.
September 22, 2007 at 3:08 am
I’m there too, I HATE PHONES. Give me email anyday, phones suck. But once in a while they are a necessary evil. Like talking to my brother who just found out his wife (my favorite sister in law) has Cervical cancer. It was an hour well spent, and I rarily say that about the phone.
Sid my dear, prayers for your family. And your ear too.
September 22, 2007 at 4:55 am
*Sigh* I hate phones too. I hate voicemail even more, though. WHy must people expect things of us, really?
hehe. Hope you’re well. Mwah!
September 22, 2007 at 5:34 am
I have just recently learned how to let phone calls go to voice mail when I am not in the mood to talk. It’s nice.
I am so sorry to hear that your father has prostate cancer. I hope he’s able to make it through radiation and have years of good quality life left. (does that make sense? I’m so tired I can’t think straight)
Hugs to you and Scott.
September 22, 2007 at 7:00 am
I can never get ahold of any of you. When ever I call, all I get is voice mail.
Bad news about your dad. Hope he recovers.
September 22, 2007 at 12:59 pm
Sorry about your dad, sweets, truly.
Hugs.
On phones, I distinctly remember leaving you a voice mail and I thought you liked it?
September 22, 2007 at 5:18 pm
I’m so sorry to hear about your dad, Don! They do work miracles with prostate cancer these days. He’s in my thoughts.
I have no problem not answering the phone either … I also have no problem erasing a long, drawn out message. Get to the point and do it quickly!
HUGS!!
September 22, 2007 at 10:57 pm
My dad was just informed he has a highly elevated PSA. He is going in for a biopsy on Tuesday.
It is difficult to confront the possibility that the immovable bolder that has been a fixture in your life is now a deminished in size and is vulnerable.
HUGs!!
September 23, 2007 at 11:01 am
Don: We’re sending good thoughts your way for your dad.
As for the phone, throw it in the drink. I hate the phone. And I have no problem not answering them. (In fact, I frustrate the hell out of my friends. 8 times out of 10, when you call me on my cell phone, it’s off. Drives them nuts.
Although… If/when you call, I’ll definitely answer!
September 24, 2007 at 8:48 am
I love receiving and sending text messages because there’s no real need to say anything more than what’s required. I suck at phone conversations because I hem and haw a lot.
September 24, 2007 at 8:49 am
Best wishes for you and your family, especially your dad.
September 24, 2007 at 4:31 pm
Unlike everyone else that has responded to this post…I like phones. OK, that is an extreme statement. I like phones when I’m talking to the people I love.
I LOVE it when I get to talk to you, Don. Since I don’t have you in the office across the hall anymore, or in the same state, the phone is one of my ways to stay connected to you. I NEED to hear the deviltry and humor in your voice sometimes. It helps keep me whole.
I LOVE it when I get to talk to my mom. Again, she’s in a different state and the phone is one way I can hear the laughter and love in her voice.
Etc, etc, etc.
It is an inconvenience most of the time but for others, I rely on the phone to help keep me sane.
October 4, 2007 at 5:07 pm
I hope things go well with your Dad.
As for the phone, my parents constantly complain they can never reach me. I don’t answer the phone.